Bad Dreams of Robbers and Foxes

When one of my nieces was little she used to say that her nightmares were "Bad dreams of robbers and foxes". Well, last night was a nightmare for me, thus the post title.

This has been an awful week for me. I am fed up at work and am very close to quitting, renting my house and hitting the highway for a year to fuck off and see the US. I left work pretty dejected last night and just wanted to go home and have a beer, but I had committed to going to a friend's birthday party. I raced home, changed, and met everyone at the restaurant.

We had a nice dinner and it was a lot of fun. Kay was there and we sat next to each other, she's really easy to talk to, but I think I have done irreparable damage there. More on this in a minute.

After dinner we went to a bar and had one drink. I was pretty tired and said I was going to leave. One of the girls there, Amy, asked if I could give her a ride home, to which I said "sure".

I have known Amy for a long time. She lives by the baseball stadium, and I have given her rides before because she doesn't have a car, and her house isn't far from mine.

We were on South Capitol right at the Capitol Building when a cop behind me turned on his lights. I wasn't sure what I had done, but I obviously pulled right over and turned off the car.

I have friends who are cops and remembered some advice they had given me. They said that you should do everything you can to make the officer feel safe. They say to turn off the car, turn the lights on inside the car, put both hands on the wheel, and don't reach into the glove box or center console for anything. I did all those things. While we were waiting for the cops to come to the window Amy said "How much have you had to drink?". Honestly, it hadn't occurred to me that I may have drank too much to be driving. I started to think about what I drank that night. I had a drink at 7pm, three beers at dinner, then I had one more at the bar at 11pm. It was now 11:30, so I had five drinks over the course of four and a half hours. I didn't feel drunk at all, and figured I was OK.

The cop came up to my window and asked me for my license, registration, and insurance. My first problem was that I knew I didn't have my insurance card on me because it was taken out of my car one night when it was broken into. I gave him everything else and fumbled around with the paperwork for a few minutes. Then came the question "Have you been drinking tonight sir?". I explained that I had two beers at dinner, but that was a few hours ago. "Step out of the car for me, please, sir." Oh shit.

Now the questions came in rapid-fire succession. "Where were you? Where are you going? Who is the girl? Do you have any drugs on you? Do you have any weapons?" Honestly, I could barely remember my name. "Sir, I am going to administer a sobriety test now, I believe you are driving impaired". Great, this just keeps getting better.

The cop proceeded to run me through a series of near-impossible processes that a gymnast couldn't complete. I was standing on one foot, counting to a thousand, dancing, walking the line, and trying to follow the tip of his pen seemingly all at the same time. Then I had to do it all over again!

Finally, the cop said "Sir, this isn't a pass/fail test, we are looking for signs of impairment, and you do not appear to be impaired, but you admitted to drinking this evening. I am going to have you park your car here and take a cab home tonight." WOOHOO!!

After a 15 minute lecture on driving under the influence, and the zero tolerance policy in the district, Amy and I hailed a cab. On the way to her place I said I was going to go home, have a beer, and soak in my hot tub until I stopped shaking. I asked Amy if she wanted to join me, and she said sure.

Amy: Amy is a cool chick, but I am really not attracted to her at all. She's a little curvier than I like my girls. She's about 5'5", brown curly hair, blue eyes, and gigantic boobs. But she's a little on the heavy side.

We got to my place and I gave Amy a pair of shorts and a t-shirt. I put on a suit and we hopped in the tub with a couple of drinks. Within five minutes we were making out and Amy's huge boobs were in my face. We made out until our fingers turned into prunes and I suggested we take a shower to rinse off the chlorine. Once naked and in the shower it was a forgone conclusion that we were having sex. We got out of the shower and went right to my bedroom. We had sex twice in a row, took a nap, and then had sex again in the morning.

At around 7am I made coffee and called a cab to take me back to my car. Amy rode with me then continued on to her house.

The real problem is that Amy and Kay are kind of friends. I don't see good things happening with this situation.