An Evening With D-Ron

The following is an email to me from D-Ron about his weekend. Allow me to set the stage:

Message Therapist: Some chick that he met online and has been occassionally having sex with. He says she's "very hot". Twice he has texted her thinking he was texting another girl he's having sex with.

Cougar: 40 year old divorced mother of two that he met at a bar outside Detroit. She divorced well and now has a house on a lake that D-Ron apparently has taken a liking to (more than the woman, I think)

Enjoy.

"So i woke up Saturday at Massage therapist. The lake cougar texted me and wanted to know if I wanted to come out for bonfire. I agreed even though I was supposed to do god knows what with therapist all day. We went out to breakfast and when we got back to her place she wondered why I was not gettin out of car. I said i had to do some things today. She asked if i was gunna come in and get my stuff. i said i had already put in car and she was not happy.


I got to lake and we went out swimming and fishing and drinking. Then her friends arrived so we took boat back. It was 4 ladies in their 40s and there kids in their 20s and younger girls in teens. It devolves from there

I am manning the grill which is a bad idea. The cougars son (20) was there and i was trying to be friendly without too much talking cause I am sure he hates me. I ask him if he likes baseball or hockey. he responds no, only Nascar and hunting. He was supposed to leave for the night, but was still there until 11pm. Then he leaves and Cougar and i go upstaris. Then he returns at 1130 and she rushes downstairs. He is yelling, "where is the guy!" I am doing my best Blair Witch in the corner upstairs in her bedroom, looking for a window. They start yelling. He leaves again, but i fully expect him to come back with a hatchet.

Downstairs the teenagers caught a snake and cut it open to find a frog inside. they teen boy is chasing the girls with a switchblade and they are crying. The girl falls and breaks her tooth. All the women are drunk by the fire talking about sex and just start laughing at the broken tooth girl. I am the voice of reason asking how she is and trying to get pain meds.

Then the daughter (23) starts talking about how last week she called her mom from an accident and how her mom was pissed she had to leave a party. It turned out she was drunk sriving and hit a tree and passed out. Wanted a ride before cops came. Turns out the cops made it there first and she went to jail.

The friend of cougar disappears with my cougars sun (20) and no one can find them. She comes back talking about how hot hew was and my cougar and her get into it. Then another lady is there with boyfriend. He keeps going fishing and then coming back to smoke pot. One of the chicks gets pissed because she is a corrections officer. Then the guy gets pissed at his girlfriend and starts swearing and shit. All the little girls start crying and ask me not to let him hit her momma again. I gathered the kids in the house and lock the dorrs like I am protecting the jews from the nazis.

All calms down and son comes back and I try and hide. The mom goes out and buys beer for her 16 yo son. Cougars son leaves again and i should leave but I need to finish my job so i stay until 5am, with a knife next to me at all times.

Cant wait till next time"

We all lean on different friends for different reasons. I go to D-Ron when I want to make my dating life seem regular.