Wait, something's not right!

When a girl says "Wait, something's not right!", almost nothing good can come of it. The expression ranks right up there with "Freeze, put your hands in the air!" and "We need to talk" on the list of things you don't want to hear on a date, especially a first date. However, on Saturday I found there is an exception.

I went out with Kay on Saturday. I had hyped the evening up a bit in my head and was actually a little nervous on Saturday afternoon. I made a point of cleaning my house and did most of the dinner prep before picking her up at 7pm. I decided to ride the motorcycle to get Kay, and she was fine with riding. From her house we went to the Maine Ave fish market and bought some lobsters.

Side note: Kay is from the mid-west and has not had much exposure to sea food. To my surprise, she has never had lobster, which I think is nearly criminal. The way I asked Kay out is that I told her she has to try lobster, and that if she would try it I would be happy to cook it for her. Hence, the date.

After the fish market we rode to my house. We sat on my deck and drank some wine while I finished up cooking. It was after 9pm before dinner was finished, but it didn't seem to matter that is was a little late because Kay is really easy to talk to. Aside from some exploding lobster bits flying around during dinner things went well. Kay liked lobster, honestly, anything is good dipped in melted butter, so I wasn't surprised. During dinner we talked about college and Kay mentioned that she was in not one but four wet t-shirt contests in Florida during spring break one year. Not only that, but she entered with another girl, and they reason they won is because they hooked up onstage. I'm not surprised that two girls hooked up on spring break, I'm just surprised that Kay would do that, she strikes me as very reserved. I made a mental note of this and we continued to talk.

I told Kay to bring a suit if she wanted to go in the hot tub, which she did. After dinner we cleaned up a bit, then changed and went into the tub. It was about 11pm by then, and we had drank almost two bottles of wine. We were both feeling pretty good. We were in the tub for about an hour, talking and relaxing. It was relatively cool out, so the water felt great. I had made a decision earlier in the evening that I was not going to try to kiss Kay or make any other moves. I thought that it would be best to keep this date platonic, then set up one more date and see where that one went. This theory went out the window around midnight when I reached across the tub and kissed her. I'm not sure exactly what prompted me to change my mind, but it was well received.

We kissed for a fairly long time, and eventually I tried taking her top off. Not surprisingly, I wasn't able to get it off despite what must have been 3 minutes of fiddling with it. I'm in my early thirties and I still can't undo a bra or bathing suit with any consistency. I wonder what runs through a girls head while I'm bumbling around with her bra clasp like a 14 year old kid. It's so embarrassing. Finally I said "I just can't get this thing" and she just laughed then reached behind her back took it off for me.

We fooled around for a little longer before bathing suits were flung in all directions onto my lawn. We were moving around in the tub, changing positions and going from seat to seat, but we didn't actually have sex, though we came close a few times (just the tip). I'm not sure how it came about, or even how it was possible, but I kind of floated in the tub and Kay went down on me. After, I picked her up and set her on the corner of the tub and returned the favor. I now confirmed my earlier thoughts that Kay was not as quiet as she lets on at first. While I was going down on her she arched her back, squeezed her nipples and started moaning, yelling, and thrashing around. When she came she muttered something unintelligible, and almost slipped out of the tub and onto my patio. I was trying to hold onto her, but with all the water it was like trying to hold onto a freshly caught fish, she kept twitching and flopping around. She stayed in the tub, though. One funny side note. My bitchy neighbor had her parents in town this weekend, and they were outside on her deck while all this was going on. We were maybe 12 feet from each other, separated only by a 6' tall wood fence. When Kay started moaning really loudly I heard my neighbor's father say "Umm, well, maybe we should be moving inside". I love it.

We had granny fingers by this point and we moved into the house to clean up with a quick shower. After the shower it was close to 1:30, so I asked Kay to spend the night. We got into bed and started right up fooling around again. We talked for a second about if we should have sex or not and after 40 seconds of debating decided it was an excellent idea. Kay has an awesome body and knows how to use it. The sex was great and we tried four or five positions. After we both came we collapsed and fell asleep for a few hours.

I'm not sure what caused it, but we both woke up at 4:30am and went at it again. Again we tried a few different positions, and at one point Kay was on top of me leaning back, with her hands resting on my legs and her feet on the bed on either side of me when I started to feel a tremendous amount of "water" rushing down my hips and onto my stomach. There was also a very loud splashing sound. I assumed that she was like Salsa and that she was somewhat of a squirter sometimes when she came. However, while all this fluid was now gushing down my stomach and chest, Kay stopped and said "Wait, something's not right!", she then jumped off me and ran to the bathroom.

I will admit that I had a moment of panic. It was dark in my room so I figured that what I thought was her cum was going to turn out to be blood. I walked over to the light switch, closed me eyes and turned on the light. I slowly opened my eyes, fully expecting my bed to look like a crime scene. However, it was just as I thought, on my bed was a 16" round (clear) wet spot, no red. My next thought was "she just pissed on me". There's only one way I know how to check, so I rubbed my hand on my stomach and brought it up to my nose. Nope, it's not pee either, which is good news. I turned off the lights and got back on the bed. Ten seconds later Kay came back and climbed back on top of me and we finished up.

Later, I said "so, everything was OK?", and she said "That was a lot of fluid. Who knew?". I guess that was a first for her. It was one of the few ways of having a positive outcome after a statement like "Wait, something's not right!".

Even if we hadn't had sex I would have said I had a great time on Saturday night. The great sex was just icing on the cake. Overall, I would say that at this point there is nothing crazy about Kay and we are planning on going out again this week.