The Ohio Belle

Saturday Beads and I rode the bike to Annapolis for the afternoon. I've noticed a distinct change in her demeanor, and not for the better. I don't know if she got some bad advice from friends or if it is something internal, but Beads is getting very territorial. That aside, she's grating on my nerves a bit. I'm sure this is do in no small part to my sister's constant jabs at her.

When I say that Beads is getting "territorial" I mean that she is trying to claim me as hers. There has been a three-fold increase in hand holding, hugging, and worst of all, public kissing. "I have to go to the little girl's room", then she leans in for a kiss. Sorry, that's just unacceptable. You can piss fine without a kiss. I noticed the change when she got back from her visit home, so I can't help but think that her friends may have given her some (poor) relationship advice.

Another example. It was a little chilly riding out on Saturday so I stopped at a store to pick up some gloves. A sales girl helped me pick something out then rung us up. After I bought the gloves I asked her for directions to downtown Annapolis. As she was giving me directions she leaned forward to get the credit card receipt and her boobs literally spilled out of her tank top. She had a bra on, but I could see both breasts, and both nipples, and I wasn't going out of my way to look, there were just right there. As soon as I saw she was hanging out I looked away, which I thought was the polite thing to do. As we walked away there was a heavy, uncomfortable, silence that I felt the need to address. In hindsight this was not the right move. I said "The girl needed a more substantial shirt", Beads said "Why?". She knew full-well why, she was just baiting me. "Um, because her cleavage was kind of hanging out when she bent over". "Well, first off she didn't have any cleavage, but what were you doing looking down her shirt?". I said "I wasn't looking down her shirt, I was talking to her then she bent over." Beads, who was now walking slightly ahead of me said "I guess I'll just have to show cleavage whenever I want your attention."

That whole conversation could have gone so much more smoothly if Beads wanted it to. She could have just said "Yeah, tuck those things away" or something else lighthearted, and we could have moved on. There was just no need to get huffy about it.

I've mentioned before that Beads lived in Charleston, SC for a few years. One of my sister's biggest problems with Beads is that she has a strong southern accent, yet she's from Ohio. Sis thinks she's trying to be someone or something she's not. I see her point. Accent aside, Beads is obsessed with Charleston. I didn't notice it much until we got to Annapolis, where everything suddenly became a comparison to Charleston. "Oh - my - gosh, this reminds me so much of Charleston, only it's smaller, and not as nice", or "Look at all these little candy shops, I can smell the fudge, it reminds me of when I lived in South Carolina". Say those two sentences in a heavy southern accent and you get the general idea of how that whole afternoon went. If you liked Charleston so much, why did you leave? I don't think I've ever asked her that, I really need to.

Long story short, Beads is getting on my nerves a bit.

I sent Stella an email on Friday and never heard back from her, which really pissed me off. It's fine if you don't want to go out with me, but it's poor form to blow me off entirely and act like you didn't get my email. What's that all about? I mean, I'm not a total stranger off the street, you work with my sister everyday, and we've met a dozen times. But really, what harm is there in going out on one date? What's the worst that can happen? You spend a few hours in the sun on a motorcycle, or get a good meal. We've met, so she knows I'm not going to pull a "Jaws" and be a total fucking flake. The rational part of me thinks "Fine, there's clearly something off about this chick" if she doesn't have the common courtesy to return a message, but the competitive part of me wants to pick up the phone and say "What's your story?"

Whatever, moving on.

I have this couple that live across the alley from me. They are probably my age or slightly older, and live in a giant house with two small kids. Their youngest is a boy, Neal, and loves dogs and motorcycles, so he gets very excited whenever I'm in the alley because I usually have one of those things with me. Through Neal I've become friends with his mom, who seems nice enough. On occasion I get home from work early and usually take the dog out for a walk. I've noticed that the family has a tall blond woman taking care of the kids in the afternoon, perhaps a nanny. I've noticed that she doesn't wear a ring, but oddly enough, I haven't gotten a close look at her face, so I really don't know if she's cute. Her body is excellent, but the few times I've seen her she's had glasses on.

I would kind of like to ask the mom about the girl (who looks to be in her late 20's), but I don't know if that's awkward or not. I really don't know them that well, my dog just licks her son's face a few times a week. I also get the feeling that the husband doesn't care much for me, so that adds to the potential awkwardness of the situation. I'll wait and see if it ever comes up.