I decided to write a few posts today because I have been traveling for work and didn't have time to write lately.
Last night I got back into town and ran to Whole Foods ("Whole Paycheck") to get some groceries. I hate being in crowded stores and generally race through the store grabbing what I need, then get the hell out of there. I don't browse or waste a single second. I can't stand being in confined spaces with people walking around like fucking space-cadets, weaving around, stopping abruptly every three feet, it makes me crazy. So you can probably guess that I don't meet a lot of people while shopping, but I hear that the grocery store is a great place to meet women.
While I was in the produce isle haphazardly filling a bag with apples I noticed in my peripheral vision that someone was painstakingly inspecting each one before putting it in her bag. I started formulating a smart-ass remark as I looked up, it's involuntary for me, but when I saw she was cute I didn't say anything. I noticed that she had a ring on her left ring finger, but it didn't look like a wedding band or engagement ring. I realized I had no idea what to say, anyway. I ran through a few options in my head, but I had nothing. To give you an idea of where my head was, one of my (better) options was to pull out the apple on the bottom of the pyramid and have them all crash to the floor. I figured that I would at least have an opener, but decided that wouldn't be fair to the people who work in the store. What else can you say: "Shop here often?", "Hey, I like apples too, we should fuck." (yes, the later did cross my mind).
I never said anything, but I think my challenge for the week is going to be to figure out something (appropriate) to say to meet a girl in a store.
My friend Chuck's theory is that I need to meet women in places other than bars if I want to increase my chances of finding some "normal" ones, and by "normal" I think he means sane. I suppose the grocery store is as good a place as any to start.
Suggestions are appreciated.
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Hi, your blog is nicely written and fun to read. My theory about looking for a normal woman is that "sane" "normal" women usually go for guys who really care about them. But then again most of the women you write about here don't sound too crazy to me. Probably because I'm a woman.
ReplyDeleteI suppose it's safe to assume from your note that you feel I don't care about most of these woman? For some that may be the case. However, I think the point of this blog is that I don't cross paths with many women I would call "sane". Caring comes later.
ReplyDeleteThanks for reading, though.