Met The Kid

I met the kid this weekend and would chalk that up as one of the stranger introductions of my life. He's actually a pretty good guy, a little shy at first, but then kind of funny.

ME invited me over for dinner Saturday night at 8pm, and told me that Kid would still be awake for a little while. While she didn't specifically say "I want you to meet my son", I took the fact that she noted that he would still be awake as a sign that she wanted me to meet him. I know that Kid likes Star Wars, so on my way to her place I stopped at Barnes & Nobles and picked up a Star Wars sticker book for him.

When I got to ME's place I was buzzed up and walked in. Kid was sitting on the couch watching cartoons and finishing up his dinner. As I rounded the corner he stuck his head over the top of the couch, looked at me, then plopped back down and took another bite of his grilled cheese. ME said a bunch of things to Kid in Farsi or Arabic then looked up at me and said "What do you want Kid to call you?" I hadn't thought about it. I said "Just NN, I guess?" ME said that in her culture it's very disrespectful for a child to address an adult by his first name, and said "How about Uncle NN?" I'm not sure I qualify as an adult, especially since I had just been considering stealing his grilled cheese, but Uncle NN was fine with me.

Kid really liked the book, and there were stickers all over the house in no time. I spent a little time talking to him about cartoons, then ME put him to bed and we had dinner.

The weather was supposed to be nice Sunday, so while we were eating I invited ME and Kid to come out on the boat the next day. She said that sounded like fun and we made plans to meet at noon at my place on Sunday. When ME got to my house she asked if I would mind driving because she had gotten lost and didn't want to drive anymore. I said sure and hopped behind the wheel, but as we left my place I looked around and saw ME, then the kid in the backseat surrounded by plastic buckets and other toys, and laughed at the ridiculousness of the scenario. There I was, driving a car with "the whole family" packed in it for a nice day at the beach. Quite absurd, really. It was like that Nicolas Cage movie The Family Man...only I don't have a Ferrari...and ME's way better looking than Tia Leoni...

The boat ride went OK. I was pretty nervous about having a four year old and ME, neither of whom can swim, on the boat at the same time, but everything went smoothly. I let Kid drive the boat for a while, which he seemed to like. I tried to pick out a fixed point and tell him to steer towards it, but he wasn't interested in that. All he wanted to do was make motorboat noises (ironic, since the real motor was running) and furiously spin the wheel from side to side. I don't even think he made the connection between turning the wheel and the corresponding change in direction of the boat. Maybe that logic sets in a few years from now. I have no idea.

When we got back to shore ME and Kid ran down the dock and played on the beach. I had to tie up the boat and take care of a few other things, but I also took the opportunity to fire down a much-needed beer in peace and quiet. The kid took a lot out of me.

One thing about the day freaked me out more than anything. My friend Chuck's parent's split up when he was one, and his mom remarried when Chuck was five. A few weeks ago Chuck's mom and stepfather were in town on their boat, and the stepfather was reminiscing about how he used to take Chuck out on his sailboat when Chuck was just four, the same age that Kid is now. Chuck mentioned how he remembers those boat trips, so I couldn't help but see the similarities in the situation. I'm not so preoccupied about the parallels between ME and I, as I am freaked out about the fact that 30 years from now Kid may remember our day on the boat together.