Fucking Egg Sandwich

I was having such a good morning...then I decided to get breakfast.

The day started off great. I rolled over and got laid. I drove home and had a huge cup of freshly made coffee. I strolled into work at a leisurely 8:30am, had a short conference call, then ran to the deli downstairs and grab an egg sandwich.

How could something so simple become such a goat-fuck?

This just happened so it's still fresh in my head. Please tell me if I'm being unreasonable. The conversation at the deli with the clerk went like this:

NN: Morning, bacon egg and cheese on wheat. Two eggs please.
Register Lady [speaking aloud in heavily accented English, my guess is that she was African]: Special number two, two eggs, two cheese, wheat, has browns...ummmmmm. OK $9.37.
NN: Nine thirty-seven for an egg sandwich, no, try again.
RL: Yes, special number two...
NN: I didn't get a special number two. I don't want eggs and hash browns, and pancakes, and all that. Just egg sandwich with an extra egg.
RL: OK

Register Lady then cancels out her last sale item by item and rings me up again.

RL: OK. -$7.23, -$1.07, -$1.07. $1.85, $1.85, $.60, $.60, $6.99. OK, $11.89. [please imagine having to sit and watch this]
NN: I wasn't going to pay nine bucks for an egg sandwich, what makes you think I'm going to pay eleven? It's not reasonable. Just an egg and cheese, but with two eggs. I can't be the first person to order this?

I should point out that the cook, who I know because I go in the goddamn place every week, has overheard this whole aggravating exchange and has already made my sandwich, placed it in a bag and handed it to me.

RL: You want special sandwich.
NN: I want an egg and cheese, but with an extra egg. That's all.

The cook starts to laugh.

RL: Yes, $11.89.
NN: Lady, you're infuriating me. Look at the menu, bacon egg and cheese, $4. Add an extra egg to that and I'll be on my way.
RL: No, see, $1.85, $1.85, $.60...
NN: I don't know what those numbers mean, stop saying that. Here's six bucks, take it or I'm leaving.

Here's the real problem. Someone took the time to open that deli then left their business in the hands of an imbecile, someone incapable of free thought and that is going to be the demise of the place.

After I offered the six dollars she cancels out the last transaction and starts over. Again. Using her imaginary formulas she comes up with eight dollars and something, I don't remember the exact number because I was talking myself out of doing her bodily harm, but it was close to nine bucks. I pulled out a twenty, placed it on the counter, slid it to her, and laughed. I had to laugh, the fucking joke was on me, she won, I was paying almost nine dollars for a take-out egg sandwich.

I hope this isn't an indication of how the rest of my day will be.